apartment B5

Naslov sporočila: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 8:09 am

odpravil se je do trafike po časopis, ker se iz nekega razloga še ni imel časa ali energije naročiti nanj. poleg tega ni imel nič proti tem jutranjim sprehodom do bližnje trafike, kjer se je možakar še vedno skušal spoprijateljiti z njim, čeprav je jon vztrajno ignoriral vse poskuse in mu namenjal zgolj vljudne, hladne nasmeške. ni imel volje za to, res ne. poleg tega je zadnja leta svojega življenja preživel med ljudmi, ki so bili daleč od običajnih pripadnikov človeške rase in še vedno je imel težave s tem, da je prijaznost sprejel kot takšno in le s težavo se je prisilil v to, da ni kazal svoje konstantne sumničavosti do vseh in vsega. bilo je zapleteno in naporno in ni mu bilo preveč všeč.

končno je prišel do svoje stavbe in se po stopnicah odpravil do svojega nadstropja. sicer bi načeloma lahko šel z dvigalom, ampak najbrž je bilo spet pokvarjeno ali pa zasedeno. poleg tega je rad hodil. na sredi stopnišča je naletel na blondinko s škatlo v roki. ujel je korak z njo in nameraval zakorakati mimo, potem pa se je ozrl proti njej. »nova soseda, kajne?« je dejal in znova ugotovil, kako zelo zanič je pravzaprav bil pri sklepanju stikov z ljudmi, ki so bili normalni. ah, k vragu. vsekakor jo je že videl, ko je spravljala stvari v stanovanje čez hodnik. »mislim, prosim, dovoli meni,« je rekel in se namrščil, ko je ugotovil, da je to spadalo pod stvari, ki bi jih moral izreči ustrežljivi sosed. kako krasno. zakaj za vraga se je že preizkušal v tej vlogi? zagrabil je škatlo in ji jo spretno izmaknil iz rok, obenem pa vanjo uprl iskreno občudujoč pogled. »ne bi rekel, da si tako močna,« se je sam pri sebi skoraj nasmehnil, ker so bile njegove besede najboljši približek komplimenta, kar jih je bil zmožen.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 8:39 am

[tag] jonah.

na srečo je imela bore malo osebnih stvari, ki jih je bilo potrebno prenesti iz selitvenega kombija navzgor v njeno novo stanovanje. zadnje prihranke je porabila za to, da si je našla neko dostojno prebivališče, ki ni smrdelo po plesni in nudilo dom celemu gnezdu miši. ostalo ji ni prav dosti denarja, kar je pomenilo, da je pred njo nekaj tednov nadvse klavrne prehrane in pozornosti na vsak zapravljen cent. do prihodnje plače se bo nekako morala znajti, a zaenkrat še ni imela časa, da bi se ukvarjala s svojimi dohodki. po stopnicah navzgor je nosila še zadnjo škatlo, polno knjig. premagovala je stopnico za stopnico, ne da bi kadarkoli sploh pomislila, da bi uporabila dvigalo dol v avli. nikoli ni rada izbrala lažje poti, raje je testirala samo sebe v nedogled in se vmes skorajda razčetverila. nekje ob vznožju stopnic je zaslišala hitre korake, ki so odmevali od hladnih sten in se ji približevali, stopnico za stopnico. umaknila se je rahlo na stran, da bi stanovalec lahko šel mimo nje, le da je očitno imel druge namene, saj je ujel korak z njo. ''b3,'' je odvrnila s številko svojega stanovanja in še naprej hodila v svojem tempu navzgor, medtem ko ji je temnolasec sledil, ne da bi točno vedela zakaj. zlahka bi šel mimo nje in naprej. ''to res ni potreb-'' je že hotela ugovarjati, ko je iz njenih rok potegnil škatlo in jo pustil praznih rok. saj bi morala biti vesela in ceniti vsako pomoč, a vajena je bila zase skrbeti sama. in to je vključevalo tudi sestavljanje in premikanje pohištva ter nošenje težkih predmetov. rahlo se je ugriznila v ustnico, ko je temnolasec takole strmel vanjo, sama pa si je dovolila na hitro oceniti tipa, ki je bil menda njen sosed. s pogledom je zaobšla številne tetovaže na razkriti koži in počasi prikimala: ''videz vara.'' res je minilo že precej časa odkar je morala nazadnje napraviti dober vtis. navadno je svojo prijaznost hranila za nadrejene. ''torej… imaš ime? starost? pet otrok in ženo?'' se je zasukala nazaj naprej in prehodila nekaj stopnic do hodnika, kjer se je nahajalo njeno novo stanovanje.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 8:49 am

»čez hodnik torej. se mi je zdelo, da sem te že videl nekje, ja,« je dejal, ne da bi povsem vedel, zakaj je izpostavil to preprosto dejstvo. zdelo se mu je, da je to spadalo pod normalen pogovor, ki so ga imeli normalni ljudje. krasno, zdaj se je lahko skoraj prištel med normalne ljudi! tisto škatlo si je brez težav namestil v naročje in zakorakal po stopnicah, ne da bi se zmenil za njene ugovore. imel je čas in imel je energijo, časopis pa je tako ali tako že prej zataknil v enega izmed žepov svojih spranih in na več mestih strganih kavbojk, zato res ni imel težav s tem.

ob njenih besedah se je moral nasmehniti, čeprav se v resnici sploh ni spomnil, kdaj ga je kdo nazadnje pripravil do tako iskrenega nasmeška. »ime mi je,« je začel, se potem samo za trenutek ustavil, ko bi skoraj izrekel svoje pravo ime in potem nadaljeval, »jon,« se je predstavil in upal, da ni opazila tiste kratke pavze. morda jo bo pripisala čemu drugemu. ni bilo važno. »jonah, ampak ja, kliči me jon,« se je ozrl proti njej. svetli lasje, nenavaden obraz, ki se mu je nemudoma zazdel neverjetno privlačen zaradi njenih potez. »in videz vedno vara,« je pokomentiral njene prejšnje besede, medtem ko je zmajal z glavo. »nimam nič od tega, imam pa cel kup okostnjakov v omari, če to šteje,« se je namuznil in pogled uprl vanjo. »starost, resno? je to tvoja navada? zaslišuješ vse nove sosede ali sem jaz prvi?«

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 9:20 am

[tag] jonah.

''verjetno si me videl enkrat v zadnjih štirindvajsetih urah, ko sem nosila vse v stanovanje,'' je previdno prikimala in na tej točki res ni vedela, kdo je bolj katastrofalen sogovorec. ona ali on. zdelo se ji je, kakor da ne eden ne drugi ne ve točno, kako se mora v takšni situaciji obnašati in zato raje sledita uveljavljenim normam, ki sta jih najverjetneje zasledila v kakšnem filmu – prijazen nasmešek, vljudnostna vprašanja in tako naprej. ''jonah,'' je izgovorila njegovo ime in rahlo priprla pogled, ko ni spregledala rahlega premora pred njegovo predstavitvijo. verjetno se samo ni pretirano rad spoznaval z novimi ljudmi. čeprav to ni ravno pojasnilo, kaj torej počne tukaj poleg nje z njeno škatlo v rokah. ''jaz sem shiloh,'' je odvrnila, četudi ji vprašanja ni vrnil: ''in ne, ne smeš me klicati shy.'' ustavila se je pred že odklenjenimi vrati njenega stanovanja in ji na široko odprla pred njim, da je lahko stopil v notranjost s hodnika. ''ne, to ne šteje. okostnjake imamo vsi. vendar je dobro vedeti, da nisi naokrog zaplodil kupa otrok, ker ne znaš uporabljati kondomov,'' se je rahlo nasmehnila in zdaj bila ona tista, ki je iz njegovih rok izpulila škatlo in jo s treskom odložila vrh majhne lesene mizice, ki je bila polna podobnih škatel. ni bila še pri volji za razpakiravanje, do zdaj je samo vse znosila povsod naokrog in čakala, da se bodo stvari magično zložile na police same od sebe. ''prvi. ne navezujem stikov z novimi sosedi. ti si ogovoril mene in človek nikoli ne more biti dovolj previden,'' je skomignila z rameni, ne da bi zares obžalovala svoje vprašanje ali da bi ji bilo nerodno ob njegovi rahli obtožbi zasliševanja. ''nisi ravno zgovoren, kajne? mislim, običajno. obstaja kakšen poseben razlog, da si se odločil piliti govorne sposobnosti na meni ali sem samo naključna žrtev?'' je glavo nagnila vstran in se z dlanjo oprla na rob mize, ko se je smehljala proti visokemu temnolascu. na prvi pogled je deloval kot nekdo, komur se je pametneje izogibati. a njene prejšnje besede so še kako veljale – videz res vara.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 9:40 am

bi moral kaj pripomniti na te besede? najbrž ne, ker so se zdele dovolj pojasnjujoče same po sebi. torej ni rabil skrbeti ali pa vleči te teme dlje, kot bi bilo potrebno. prekleto. najdi si prijatelje, so rekli. da ne bo tako težko in da bo potem celoten proces vklapljanja nazaj v normalno družbo lažji. »shiloh?« je ponovil njeno ime in se potem le nasmehnil ob njenem komentarju. »če ti tako rečeš. zanimivo ime imaš,« je pripomnil. to se je zdelo kot nekaj, kar bi lahko rekel. nedolžna pripomba, ki je bila na mestu. poleg tega je imela res zanimivo ime in bilo mu je všeč.

stopil je v notranjost njenega stanovanja in ji dopustil, da mu je iz rok izmaknila škatlo. »to bi bilo malo težko,« je dejal ob njenih besedah in se nato namrščil. prav, saj ni rabila vedeti tega. »nov sem v mestu. recimo; kolikor toliko nov,« je pojasnil in potem skomignil z rameni. »sicer pa uporabljati kondome ni ravno neka umetnost. prav. karkoli že,« je raje nehal govoriti in s pogledom zdrsnil po stanovanju, preden se je vrnil do nje. nasmehnil se je ob njenih besedah. »naključna žrtev si, žal. mislim, baje moraš dobro poznati svoje sosede. vsaj enega. morda bom kdaj potreboval kaj in bom prišel trkati na tvoja vrata,« je dejal, čeprav je takrat ugotovil, da to ni bil dejansko razlog, da je spregovoril z njo. ampak saj dejanskega razloga niti ne bi znal najti. ob njenih besedah se je ustavil, preden bi s pogledom hladno zavrtal v njene oči. »je tako očitno?« se je namesto tega potrudil za nasmešek, nato pa je skomignil z rameni. »ampak kakorkoli že, te lahko povabim na kavo? čaj? vodo? karkoli pač piješ? v moje stanovanje, ki je najbrž bolj… funkcionalno?« je našel približek dobre besede, čeprav morda ni bila najbolj vljudna ali prijazna, česar se je hitro zavedel in ji zato namenil tudi opravičujoč nasmešek.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 9:56 am

[tag] jonah.

''um, hvala?'' je zamomljala rahlo nerodno, ker ni prav dobro vedela, kako naj sprejme… kompliment ali karkoli je to že bilo. prikimala je sama pri sebi in škatlo potisnila proti ostalim, da je bila teža osredotočena na sredino mize in ne na strani. niti slučajno ni imela dovolj denarja, da bi si kupila novo mizo. tale je bila precej uboga, a stala je in na njej se je dalo jesti. to je bilo najbolj važno, kajne? ''kaj bi bilo malo težko?'' se je namrščila, ko je z hip izgubila rdečo nit. ''potem sva nova že dva. in kaj točno te je pripeljalo iz new yorka? in sklepam, da si iz new yorka zaradi naglasa,'' je hitro pojasnila, da je ne bi imel za zalezovalko, ki je pred prihodom v stanovanjski kompleks preverila ozadje prav vsakega od potencialnih sosedov. bila je dobra z naglasi, nič drugega. ''ne bom ti posojala sladkorja. dvomim, da ga bom imela sploh zase dovolj. prvih nekaj mesecev bo precej težkih, glede na to da je šla večina mojega denarja za tole stanovanje. po nekaj plačah bo že bolje,'' je odvrnila in se naslonila nazaj na kuhinjski pult, roke pa razširila na obe strani in se z dlanmi držala za rob. nekaj je bilo na temnolascu, kar jo je motilo. bodlo v oči. in ne to niso bili običajni hladni prebliski v njegovih očeh ali način, kako se je previdno držal zase in se obotavljal pred vsako besedo. ''ni očitno. samo dobro opazujem,'' je zmajala z glavo, ob njegovem povabilu pa skeptično pogledala v tla in počasi pričela odkimavati. ''ne, hvala,'' je samo preprosto zavrnila, ne da bi dodala kakšno pojasnilo. v stanovanju bo samo spala, ni iskala prijateljstev, ki bi jo kasneje utegnila ovirati. in to je pomenilo, da bi ga morala prav hitro potisniti skozi vrata ven na hodnik in prekiniti poznanstvo, še preden bi zares vzklilo. ''prepričan sem, da boš našel kakšno drugo sosedo, ki ti bo z veseljem sledila v stanovanje in posojala sladkor. nisi ravno napačen, gotovo se bo našla katera.''

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 10:21 am

»nisem takšne vrste tip,« je odvrnil na njene vprašljivo ponovljene besede. ni spal z vsemi; ni vsak večer domov vlačil drugega dekleta, ki bi ga našel v baru. večina ljudi je zaradi njegovega videza sklepala, da je bil kreten, ki je čas zabijal z lahkimi dekleti in uličnimi zadevami, ampak resnica je bila dlje od tega. »videz vara, se spomniš?« je dejal, njegov glas zaradi vsega skupaj morda nekaj odtenkov bolj hladen, kot bi moral biti. dvignil je pogled ob omembi new yorka. »splet okoliščin,« je bil kratek. ni ji mogel ravno povedati, da je delal pod krinko, ustrelil policista in so ga nato po hitrem postopku spravili stran, kajne? to bi bilo preveč odkrito in jon je imel težave že z normalno mero odkritosti.

»oh, okej?« je privzdignil obrvi ob njenih besedah in se nato namrščil. dekle je bilo odkrito. takšne odkritosti, milo rečeno, ni pričakoval. seveda je bil navajen nanjo in jo je sprejel povsem normalno, ampak še vedno ni bila nekaj, kar bi z lahkoto uvrstil med normalne sosedske pogovore. opazoval jo je, ko je nadaljevala, preden je vanjo uprl hladen pogled. »prav, res misliš, da se gre za to? nisem popolnoma prepričan, kakšno predstavo imaš o meni, ampak ne skušam te spraviti v mojo posteljo, ker si pač privlačna soseda. hotel sem ti samo pomagati, ampak ja, saj veš, pomoč je dandanes očitno res precenjena,« je zmajal z glavo in prekrižal roki v naročju. kako za vraga naj bi spoznal koga normalnega, če pa so se še tisti majhni pogovori takole izjalovili? »poleg tega prav. prepričan sem, da boš zelo uživala v doseganju svojega cilja, ker deluješ kot nekdo, ki mu je to pomembno in se ne obremenjuje s sosedi in tem sranjem. ampak glej, dobronameren nasvet: ne pozabi nase, da ne boš presenečena, ko se boš nekega dne zalotila pri dosegi cilja in ugotovila, da si spotoma pozabila nase,« je zaključil, preden je zavzdihni. preveč podatkov. morda? »in hej, če boš kadarkoli kaj potrebovala, se lahko brez problema oglasiš pri meni. nimam težav s posojanjem.«

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 9:17 pm

[tag] jonah.

''kratko in jedrnato. očitno nerad govoriš o svoji preteklosti – zanimivo,'' je zamomljala bolj zase kot zanj in nato zavzdihnila, razočarana sama nad seboj. tole spoznavanje ji niti slučajno ni šlo dobro od rok, kar je pomenilo, da mora trenutno situacijo popraviti. kdo ve, kdaj ji bodo dodelili delo pod krinko in se bo morala komu približati. tole je bila odlična vaja. ''oprosti... nočem biti preveč radovedna. v mojem poklicu je postavljanje vseh možnih vprašanj za boljše razumevanje osebe skorajda ključnega pomena. reciva temu poklicna deformacija in pustiva to temo, prav?'' mu je namenila rahel nasmešek, ki je nakazoval na iskren trud z njene strani, da zakrpa nastali prepad. ''narobe si me razumel,'' je nato hitro zmajala z glavo in se odrinila od pulta ter stopila preko kuhinje bližje k temnolascu: ''niti pomislila nisem, da bi me hotel spraviti v posteljo. po resnici povedano se mi zdi, da sem premlada zate in poleg tega si ti prepameten, da bi poskušal podreti sosedo, ki jo prvič vidiš.'' bilo je res, ni deloval kot nepremišljen tip in na videz bi mu pripisala pozna dvajseta leta. ne bi se zapletel z nekom, ki je komajda polnoleten. in ni je gledal na takšen način, kakor trevorjevi prijatelji – ni ga zanimala. ''gre se samo zato da bi sposojanje sladkorja nakazovalo na prijateljski odnos in nekako trenutno poskušam najprej urediti svoje življenje. nimam časa niti za prijateljevanje,'' je pojasnila s kančkom slabe vesti. verjetno ne bi škodilo imeti enega prijatelja, mar ne? a kaj ko je morala vso svojo energijo usmeriti predvsem v delo in s tem svojo najboljšo stran prihraniti za človeka, ki bo njen partner in ob njej praktično 24/7. ''no daj. pokaži mi to tvoje veličastno stanovanje, da opraviva z dilemo o tem, kdo bo komu posodil sladkor in kdo koga spravil v posteljo, da?'' je naenkrat stopila mimo njega in se odpravila skozi izhodna vrata njenega stanovanja nazaj ven na hodnik. malce se je lahko potrudila zanj, čisto malce.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pon Jul 22, 2013 9:29 pm

rahlo se je namrščil ob njenih besedah. »zveniš sumljivo,« je delil svoje mnenje z njo, medtem ko se je na njegovem obrazu pojavil nasmešek. »mislim, si vedno na glas delaš opazke o ljudeh? preteklost je navsezadnje samo to. zakaj bi si kdorkoli želel riniti v nekaj tako zapletenega?« se je dotaknil še prejšnje teme in nato skomignil z rameni, kot da bi želel reči, da sam že ni bil tak tip človeka. preteklost te je morda zaznamovala in te preoblikovala, ampak to še vedno ni pomenilo, da se je bilo pametno vanjo vtikati. navsezadnje je bilo potem to preveč zakomplicirano in umazano. samo pokimal je ob njenih naslednjih besedah. ni hotela govoriti o svojem delu? prav, krasno, potem tudi njemu ne bo treba razlagati, da je bil policist. včasih so ljudje mislili, da se šali – pogled nanj je navsezadnje pripovedoval drugačno zgodbo, ki je bila daleč od tipične predstave o policistih.

zakorakala mu je bližje in sledil ji je s pogledom, medtem ko je ohranil nevtralen, morda samo za odtenek hladnejši izraz na obrazu. ni maral ljudi, ki so ga zavrnili ob tistih redkih poskusih, da bi storil nekaj normalnega. »življenje brez prijateljev zna biti zelo osamljeno,« je dejal. kdo boljši kot on za govorjenje o tem, kajne? ljudje, ki jih je smatral za to, so bili v resnici njegovi sovražniki in to je vedno vedel. nikoli ni bil sproščen, nikoli ni nikomur zaupal. in zdaj se je trudil s to smešno, drobno svetlolasko, ki ga je hotela odriniti čim bolj daleč od sebe v čim bolj kratkem času. krasno. potem pa se je premaknila in spet se je namrščil. zdaj se je odločila, da hoče videti njegovo stanovanje? sledil ji je in obenem iz žepa izvlekel ključe ter odklenil vrata in jih na široko odprl. »najbrž ni ravno veličastno,«jo je opozoril, medtem ko je zakorakal v kuhinjo in odložil časopis na pult, se nanj naslonil tudi sam in pogled uprl vanjo. »torej, shiloh. kaj boš?« je dejal in se sam pri sebi nasmehnil. kako bizarna je bila situacija in ona se tega najbrž sploh ni zavedala.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 23, 2013 8:32 pm

[tag] jonah.

''potem se ne bo dosti razlikovalo od življenja preden sem se preslila sem, tako da ne bo nobenih problemov,'' je samo skomignila z rameni, ne da bi naprej razpredala o sami osamljenosti. nikoli ni imela prijateljev in ni se mogla ravno pohvaliti s čudovito družino, ki bi jih lahko nadomestila. navajena je bila sama hoditi po svoji poti in se nikoli ne ustavljati. ljudje so hitro obupali nad njo, ko so ugotovili, kako prazna in nezainteresirana je. in to ji je bilo všeč. raje je bila sama, bilo je znatno bolj varno. ''v redu je. udobno. takšno kot moje le drugače opremljeno,'' je prikimala, ko je s pogledom zaobjela stanovanja. verjetno so imela vsa v zgradbi podobno razporeditev sob, od stanovalcev pa je bilo odvisno, kakšne barve in kakšen okus jim bodo dali. njeno je bilo v razsulu – nekako tako kakor ona sama. ''kaj bom?'' je ponovila vprašanje in se zasukala naokrog proti njemu z muzajočim se nasmeškom. ''hm...'' je s konico kazalca potrepljala našobljene ustnice in gledala naokrog, da bi našla odgovor. ni ga nameravala prositi za pivo ali za kozarec vode. ni rada jemala od drugih, če jim kasneje ni mogla tega povrniti. glede na stanje njenega hladilnika pa je bilo vprašanje, kdaj bi ga sama lahko povabila k sebi na pijačo. toda njen pogled se je nato ustavil na predalniku v sprejemnici in na usnjenem toku, ki je bil položen vrh njega. ''je to pas za pištolo?'' se je namrščila, ko je prepoznala predmet, ki ga bo v nekaj dneh prejela tudi sama. takoj je pomislila na njegovo izogibanje vprašanjem o preteklosti in o tem, zakaj se je priselil v mesto. rahlo dvomeče je dvignila pogled navzgor proti njemu in zamrznila prejšnji nasmešek. ''morda bi morala oditi, um,'' se je prestopala na mestu in sicer vedela, da bi bilo bolje počakati na pojasnilo, kakor da sama napravlja zaključke. toda zakaj bi nek civilist imel pištolo? to ni bil teksas.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 23, 2013 9:15 pm

bila je… nenavadna, to zagotovo. nekaj je bilo na njej; nekaj, česar ni znal natančno določiti, ampak deklič ga je pritegnil s svojo nenavadnostjo. poleg tega pa se je zdaj, ko je nekaj časa takole strmel v njen obraz, ta zdel skoraj znan in vsekakor privlačen. tega ni mogel ravno zanikati; bila je čudovita in če bi jon ponavadi padal na samo takšne stvari, bi jo do zdaj vsekakor že skušal spraviti v posteljo. tako pa zanj vse skupaj ni bilo preprosto. moral je najti nekaj posebnega na dekletu; moralo ga je nekaj pritegniti, sicer preprosto ni videl smisla v čimerkoli. sicer ni mogel reči, da ga svetlolaska ni pritegnila, ampak njeno posebnost je še vedno odkrival. slutil jo je; toliko je že vedel.

čakal je, da bi mu povedala, kaj bo pila. imel je praktično vse; odkar se je vselil, si je za nalogo zadal normalnost. in to se je zdelo normalno; napolniti hladilnik z nepomembnimi stvarmi, čeprav je zdaj sumil, da je ravnal neumno. pa ne da bi imel denarne težave – daleč od tega, dejansko, navsezadnje so mu plačali lepo vsoto samo zato, da je bil tiho glede svojega dela. sledil je njenemu pogledu in začutil tisto nelagodnost, ko je odkrila pas za pištolo. »ne,« je rekel, medtem ko je zakorakal tja in potisnil trapasti pas za pištolo nekam na stol in izven dosega njenih oči. prekleto, ni pričakoval ljudi v stanovanju. ob njenih naslednjih besedah se je namrščil. »morda bi bilo to najbolje, da,« se je strinjal z njo. morda res, preden kje odkrije še kakšen predmet njegove preteklosti ali sedanjosti in se odloči, da je popoln psihopat. »mislim, še vedno pa si kadarkoli vabljena. dobrodošla. če kaj potrebuješ. saj veš. žal mi je, prav?« je skoraj zmedeno nadaljeval, medtem ko jo je še zadnjič ošinil s pogledom in nato zaprl vrata v svoje stanovanje. bil je skrajni čas, da pospravi svoje orožje, ki je ležalo po najbolj nenavadnih kotičkih stanovanja.

-- fin.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 4:19 pm

[tag] jonah, duh.

this was a bad bad bad idea. a very bad idea. she was still wearing a skimpy costume that was neccesary for tonight's theme party at the little red club and yet she strolled straight pass her apartment and stopped in front of his doors. it was two in the morning and she finished her shift half an hour ago. this time she took a cab and didn't walk as usual. because she didn't want to risk a possible kidnapping or rape if she walked the streets half naked in the middle of the night. but she kept it on. because she wanted to see his face when he'll realized she's barely wearing anything at all. this was probably the most daring and risky idea she has ever thought of. with her luck he probably won't even open the door or will be mad that she dared to wake him at this un-godly hour. she fixed her tiny almost non-existent skirt and then started to loudly knock on his door. hopefully she won't wake any of their neighbours who might get a chance to view her ass and cleavage while she practically threw herself at jonah. but he said she could come seek him out and right now she needed... oh, fuck. she had no idea what she needed nor wanted. it was only clear to her that she didn't want to go home to that empty apartment, she wanted to feel those lovely goose bumps again, her skin shivering, her stomach flipping around, his lips kissing hers. after a night of dancing and of letting weird guys touch her body all she wanted was his embrace. and then he finally opened that door and her mouth slightly drop: ''hi.'' yummy abs.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 5:28 pm

he wasn’t really sleeping – but then again, jonah was never really sleeping. he didn’t have the quiet, peaceful nights that everyone talked about. he was always restless; always having nightmares about his previous life and so he usually slept four or five hours per night. it was way easier this way. he was standing by the open window, staring at the dark streets and thinking about all sorts of stuff when the doorbell rang. he had just his sweatpants on, but he didn’t even care about that as he walked to the door and opened them.

and there she was. he caught himself staring at her in amazement because he didn’t expect that. he didn’t except her – not now, not like that. “shiloh,” he murmured; his voice suddenly husky because of her. he had no idea what she was wearing but she looked damn good. there was a long moment of silence as he just stared at her and then he moved, suddenly pulling her closer; pulling her inside and closing doors behind her. he didn’t say anything – after all, there was nothing to say as he kissed her with a weird, unusual passion and slowly pushed her to the wall with his body, his hands already embracing her body. “hello, stranger,” he smiled a little as his hand slid on her back and his fingers grabbed her bare skin. “are you sure?” he murmured; he just had to make sure that she is comfortable; that this, all of it, will be okay. he cared and he got rid of that thought way too fast as he kissed her again, this time slower and more demandingly.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 5:50 pm

[tag] jonah, duh.

her eyes immediately dropped to the black line disappearing into the deep v covered by sweatpants. and then she had to look away before it would become completely obvious just how much she lacked self-control. or was this even about self-control at all? she was so out of her depths right now that it seemed silly she even entertained the idea of surprising him in the middle of the night wearing a lame excuse for clothes. ‘’hi,’’ she repeated standing there like a fool. but then he was pulling her inside, finally, and her arms reached up to his shoulders. she was quite tiny in comparison to him, a head smaller. she should feel like a captive when he pushed her back against the wall, due to his larger frame, his arms around her. but no. she felt safe and protected. and she fit perfectly next to him as she snuggled closer, her lips already returning that welcoming kiss with all the passion she had. she gasped for air and then let out a tiny whimper when he moved a bit back, his hands following the curve of her waist and fingers digging into the skin. ‘’I just came by to say hello,’’ she managed to smile but her eyes were still set on his lips as if she couldn’t focus on anything else. ‘’we are just messing around. just that. anything more… anything final I’m not ready for that,’’ she replied and added a ‘yet’ inside her head. she wasn’t ready for sex yet. but for his touches and his kisses – definitely. ‘’just make me forget for a while, okay?’’ were her last words before his lips claimed her again and this time she raised his hand and hooked his finger behind the edge of her skirt. she stepped forward, away from the wall, her other hand following the ripped lines of his stomach and then over the dark trail that fascinated her so much.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 6:01 pm

jonah honestly couldn’t care less about anything at that moment. she was there and that was all that mattered. he had no idea what the hell was happening with him because he was never like that; never so drawn to a single person and never so happy to see someone, but he didn’t care about that either. she was perfection. she was at his place and her kisses felt amazing. he gazed into her eyes and just nodded as she spoke. he understood. he was probably able to imagine everything she was going through and he was not going to put any pressure on her. if they are going to do that, it will be done her way, that much was clear to him.

“that’s okay too,” he responded. he was never the guy to look for sex only anyway. to be honest, he usually didn’t have the patience with people, especially not with girls, but she was clearly different. he was prepared to wait for her, to do everything as she said and to make her an exception. “come here,” he murmured and then suddenly lifted her up. she was almost weightless in his arms as he carefully carried her to his bedroom and then laid her on the bad – slowly, as if she would be a princess. his hand slid down her skin again; researching it and claiming it with every move. he kissed her again. he knew what would make her feel good. he goddamn knew and it was exactly what he was going to do. their lips parted, but he followed her jawline with kisses, paid some more attention to her neck and then moved lower; to her collarbone, while his hands slowly pulled her closer and slid back to her top as he looked at her, almost as if he would be asking permission to get rid of it; to throw it away and to reveal her bare skin.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 6:56 pm

[tag] jonah, duh.

‘’jon-‘’ she planned to protest as he lifted her up as if she weighted nothing but managed to silence herself as she stared back down. the way he was looking at her, treating her. she never even imagined that a man could be like this. it was probably sad that she has never given herself a chance to try. to risk it all. to find someone who could make her feel a bit more alive. and at this thought her heart fluttered up – not just anyone would be good. it was him. ‘’jonah,’’ she softly mumbled as he lowered her down on his bed, the mattress immediately accommodating itself to the weight of both of them. her breaths were shallow and quickened and she gazed right at him as his hands followed some sort of pattern over her skin. as if he was trying to memorize it all and mark it at the same time. ‘’this feels… amazing,’’ she said incoherently as a kiss landed on her jawline, her words covering themselves with a deep moan. when he stopped she slowly nodded, but then stopped his hands before moving forward. ‘’the way you look at me – it’s - no one ever…’’ started as she pulled the lacy top over her head, letting it drop somewhere behind. she felt the urge to cover her breasts with her hands but she stopped at the very last moment, instead she cupped his face and softly kissed his lips: ‘’I talk too much, don’t I?’’ she knew she should be quiet, let him take the lead, but the nerves were working their way through her. ‘’you seem like a perfect potential boyfriend for someone out there. tell me again why are you single?’’ she suddenly found herself saying and then she was trying to sit up, slightly panicking: ‘’I mean, shit, you are, right?’’

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 7:20 pm

he never saw it coming. he never even imagined that this would feel so right, even though a part of him knew it probably meant nothing and that she was just.. doing what? using him to finally do something she didn’t do before? that was probably it, but jon couldn’t make himself believe that it was that simple so he didn’t think about that at all. it was easier to pretend that this might mean something. he was always looking for someone special. for someone amazing and different and she was all of that. he just didn’t expect that to happen and now he knew he lost her before he ever got her. it was weird, thinking about that so he stopped.

he looked at her and smiled a little when she spoke. “but you are so goddamn special. I don’t get it,” was his only comment on her words. he watched her as she got rid of the top and he could see the hesitation in her eyes as she did that. she was beautiful. her breasts were perfectly shaped, but he didn’t stare at them. his eyes were staring at her eyes as she cupped his face. he kissed her back. “no,” he murmured, “no, you don’t.” she didn’t talk that much and he could handle that. it was better if she would be quiet for sure. he stroked her hair with one hand while the other hand slowly found its way to her breasts. he cupped one of them and did the one thing that always felt good. and then she spoke again and before he even realized there was panic in her eyes and he smiled a little when he shook his head ‘no’. “I am single, don’t worry about that. why? too much skeletons in the closet, I suppose. my past… wasn’t exactly great and I don’t really believe that I’m boyfriend material. also, I never found someone who would be interesting enough,” he admitted with a little smile. “come here,” he pulled her closer again, hugging her and holding her bare body to his; skin on skin. it felt amazing. just them in the darkness of his room… he had to kiss her again; this time more passionate than ever, probably because her bare skin on his was driving him crazy now.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 7:53 pm

[tag] jonah, duh.

‘’you don’t get – what?’’ she dumbfounded with wide eyes. was it really that hard to believe that people usually only saw her as a white trash trailer park queen? as a younger sister of local shenanigan. surely she was the one in her family who worked her ass off to pay the bills, buy groceries and even get herself through school and college. but they still labeled her as trash. men even more than women, thinking she was easy. ‘’I kinda do, I’m from alabama. all southern people talk too much,’’ she gave him a bright smile. her accent was always trying to come through, no matter how hard she worked on losing it. it was there, a clear reminder where she came from. ‘’if you do find someone, tell me. so we can call this whole deal off,’’ she warned him and then his hand brushed her breast and her back hit up from the mattress, leaning into his touch as his fingers grazed the sensitive spot. what was she saying? something about him and girlfriends. she would give just about everything to know more about his past, but a deal was a deal. they’ll both keep their skeletons in their closets, never mentioning them. never discussing them. her lips opened as she moaned against his mouth, his tongue meshing with hers. she started to understand the dynamics, at this point she wasn’t careful and trying to get it right. she just kissed him back and then used some of the moves from the academy, getting the upper hand and rolling him on his back, her hips straddling his waist. she moved her hair across one shoulder and her fingers curled around the edge of his sweatpants, starting to pull them down. ‘’may I? I mean, can I? is it okay?’’ she wasn’t sure why she was asking but she still wasn’t fully adapted to this new nympho alter-ego. she pulled them just slightly down and then propped herself forward, her hands resting on the sides of his face and she lightly nipped his bottom lip. made a tiny trace with her tongue over his neck. kissing the place where his heart hammered. stopping right where the dark trail began. ‘’hm,'' she popped her lips.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Tor Jul 30, 2013 11:14 pm

“you. it’s as simple as that. I don’t get you, not entirely,” he admitted. something he never actually thought he will say but did. he didn’t get her, he wasn’t able to grasp the idea that she was this amazing person and couldn’t even see it. he almost wished for a second that he could make her see it. if she could just see herself as he saw her, she would have to believe him. but that wasn’t possible and then again, it wasn’t something he should be thinking about. not now and not ever. “alabama, hm? yeah, I figured,” he smiled. it was quite obvious from time to time; it was in her voice, even if she tried to hide it. and jonah was good with accents.

“right. and the same goes for you then,” he had to force a smile which felt weird on his face, even though he knew that the idea of her with someone else shouldn’t feel that weird or threatening. after all, this – whatever this was and whatever they were doing – wasn’t a serious commitment of any sort and he knew that. at least the reasonable part of him did. she was more relaxed now; he could feel that much. she wasn’t so tense and the way she kissed him – yeah, she definitely gave in. he was suddenly on his back and he let her do whatever she wanted to. hell, he would let her do anything at this point. he watched her as she was researching his body and then smiled a little when she spoke. “it is okay. everything is okay, but then again, you don’t need to. you don’t need to do anything you don’t want to. you know that, right?” he was looking right at her now, just making sure. he just had to laugh at her ‘hm’, even though his laugh sounded a bit husky. “what do you mean, hm?” he just had to ask.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Sre Jul 31, 2013 5:32 pm

[tag] jonah, duh.

‘’no worries, I’m not planning on starting a relationship any time soon. I have my career to worry about,’’ she spoke against his lips and opened her eyes to give him some sort of reassurance. not that he actually needed that. it was obvious that this was just about learning, about fooling around and about her trying to live a little. it was most certainly not something serious. wasn’t it? at one point she covered his hand with hers and pulled them back to her front when he tried to cup her face and caress her hips. that won’t pull that aching edge away. she needed more. ‘’jonah… shush, okay?’’ she left a gentle kiss behind her when she maneuvered herself down the front of his body, before pulling his sweatpants down his thighs. ‘’hm?’’ there was a slightly wicked grin in her smile as she hooked a finger under the waistband of his briefs which where straining over a quite impressive erection. not that she could separate an impressive one from a disappointing one. but she doubted that this man under her would be able to disappoint her in any way. he was just far too perfect for that – even if he insisted on being a broken person with a shattered past. ‘’another first with you,’’ she bit down on her lower lip and pulled the remaining piece of clothing down. yes, her breath caught in her throat and she had to look back up at him as if she needed an ‘okay’, some sort of a permission. one of her hands pushed her hair to the side and then settled down on his thighs, the other one carefully wrapping itself around the base of his length. this should feel wrong, she should feel slutty. then why did she feel anything but that? she lowered her head down, her tongue licking away the pre-cum from the tip of his cock. and then she wrapped her lips around the top, her hand pumping up and down. surely this will be the absolutely worst and inexperienced blow job he’ll ever receive, but that shouldn’t matter. she wasn’t trying to make herself be memorable, she was just using him. she was supposed to be using him.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pet Avg 02, 2013 6:51 pm

he smiled a little. he did not know why was he suddenly so excited about that – about her being pretty sure that she won’t get into a relationship with anyone any time soon. did that mean – yeah, it probably meant that he will see more of her in the future. near future, that was. not necessary any other kind of future, even though he suddenly realized he might like that idea a bit more than he should. he kissed her back and obeyed her order gladly. his eyes were on her as she moved and he just wasn’t able to get the grin out of his face.

he watched her take off his pants and his briefs. he couldn’t make himself stop staring at her. god, she was beautiful and as she spoke, he had to smile. “and believe me, it is all my pleasure,” he murmured. he knew he was going to do everything to make her feel good a bit later. he was good at that – he was told he always knew exactly what to do and honestly, he kinda wanted to make her scream. and then he could feel her grip on his erection. it took his breath away for a second. he didn’t know what it was – maybe just the thought that he was his first or more likely the idea of her, beautiful and amazing shiloh being here with him at that moment. his hands suddenly grabbed sheets as slowly licked his hard cock and there was a weird noise coming out of his throat. he closed his eyes for a second and then looked at her again. “oh god,” he murmured and finally managed to caught his breath. “holy shit.” he leaned on his elbows and glanced at her. “fuck,” was another word he somehow managed to say while he tried really hard not to grab her and pull her closer. he could do that – he really, really wanted to do that and make her enjoy as much as he was enjoying.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Pet Avg 02, 2013 7:45 pm

[tag] jonah, duh.

there was something absolutely incredible about watching him lose control. the way he gripped those sheets, the way he could barely make a coherent sound. and the way his abs tightened every time he had to stop himself from reaching towards her. because she noticed how he almost made a move, pulled her up with his hand or maybe he wanted to push her mouth deeper on. she released the tip with a popping sound and ran a finger over the entire length as if she considered playing with him for a little bit, before releasing him. ‘’jonah,’’ she bit down on her lower lip and then she was pushing herself upward towards him, her hand still clasped around his hard cock. she’s not letting that one go yet. she settled herself in the crook of his arm, her lips already reaching for his. this was pathetic. if she was that desperate just to feel his lips on hers, then what would happen if she would let herself drift even further into this? would she craved him every minute of every day? her hand shifted, started to pump up and down and now she had an up-close view of his raspy breaths, tight grunts. she didn’t count second or minutes, she just tautened her grip and her teeth were nibbling at his earlobe right up until the moment she felt his cock tighten and his breath vanished. that loud curse, that deep groan was what made her chuckle into his ear while he came all over her hand. ‘’I’d say I deserve a golden star for effort,’’ she murmured and then rested her forehead on his tattooed shoulder. tattoos seemed like a work of art on his skin. she had none, yet. maybe one day. ‘’this was… enlightening. very educating,’’ her lips formed a wide smile as she looked up to him. ‘’tired yet?’’

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Sob Avg 03, 2013 8:07 am

his hand pulled her closer as she moved towards him. she was still holding him and he could feel all the blood in his body rushing down there, but he didn’t hesitate not even a second before kissing her again. she was driving him insane, this amazingly beautiful young blonde. all of this wasn’t really new to him, but it did feel somehow special now and here. he knew he wasn’t even allowed to think about that – after all, she was not his to keep or to think about her in that way, but still… a part of him just couldn’t help himself.

“fuck,” he suddenly murmured and it was possible that he said it out more loudly the next time as he could feel the climax approaching. she was looking at him – he was aware of that. he was also aware of the fact that his fingers dug into the skin of her arm as he came and he could feel his heartbeat going crazy. he groaned a little and closed his eyes for a second. he had to smile when he heard her words. “trust me, you deserve more than just a golden star,” he murmured and looked at her. he had to laugh because of her question and then he moved. “a bit tired, maybe. but now it’s my turn. okay?” he smiled and pulled his pillow closer and then gently pushed her back. he kissed her and god, he enjoyed doing that. his lips followed the line of her jaw and went lover. her skin was burning under his lips and then he kissed her breasts. he put a lot of effort in that; he took his time slowly caressing the sensible skin and then, after a while, his lips went lower. his hands were on her hips and his eyes looked up to her. “can I?” he murmured with soft voice, looking for permission. he realized that she probably wasn’t ready for sex yet and that was okay, but he wanted to do something for her and he had just the right thing in mind.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Ned Avg 04, 2013 12:33 pm

[tag] jonah, duh.

‘’no, i don't,’’ she murmured, just loud enough for her to hear. she didn’t deserve anything. all her life she listened to people calling her white trailer trash. and that basically meant she was a useless whore, which made her feel insecure, even if she’ll never be able to admit that. but the way he was looking at her right now was completely unknown to her. and it scared her on a whole new level. ‘’what do you mean?’’ she managed to rasp out as her head hit the soft people and his muscled body towered over her. she returned the kiss, because there was really nothing else she could’ve done. there was no way she’d be able to resist those lips. her skin felt feverish and the butterflies in her stomach were all out of control. she could feel all the heat running down the path his lips left behind. she tried to silence the moans and whimpers her throat made as he dipped his head lower and lower. and when he looked back up at her, she shattered completely: ‘’jonah... no.’’ the denial escaped her lips before she had time to think about it. but sometimes those little things that slipped from you lips were the very truth. ‘’no, it's... enough for today, okay? i'm sorry,’’ she started to pull herself up, away from him, even though her body still craved his touch. beyond craved. she had to keep herself in check, cool herself down or she might as well start to beg him to go with her all the way. ‘’i probably shouldn't have come anyway. and you were great. really. but i have to, um, go. i have some errands to run,’’ excuses started to come out and she felt the need to cover herself up, mostly unsuccessfully. she was still sitting on his bed, just trying to get away from his hands. ‘’not now of course. it’s late. but early in the morning,’’ she added with confusion and then hid her face behind her open palms, shaking her head. crap. she was absolutely terrified.

Naslov sporočila: Re: apartment B5 Ned Avg 04, 2013 1:22 pm

her skin was so soft and it felt so delicate under his fingers. and his fingers actually felt like they were on fire every single time he touched her. but that wasn’t bad – it was the best feeling possible, it felt so goddamn right and it was also something that made him feel alive – really, truly alive – and that was something he didn’t feel in a long, long time. there was definitely something about her and he couldn’t resist her. but then she suddenly and without a warning pulled away from him and he felt a unexpected emptiness.

he was a bit surprised when she started to talk and he tried really hard not to feel rejected. he had to constantly remind himself that all of this was new for her so he should really not be upset about any of that. “you have what?” he couldn’t help the surprised, somehow bitter tone of his voice. he really should pull himself together. he sat on the edge of the bed and didn’t move his eyes from her, not even for a brief second. and then she hid her face and shook her head and suddenly he understood and almost felt ashamed of himself. he quietly got up, grabbed one of his shirts from the nearby chair and then sat down next to her. he carefully put his shirt on her shoulders, covering up her bare skin before he pulled her closer and made her lean her head against his chest. “hey,” he whispered; his voice a bit husky. “it’s okay, don’t be sorry or anything. in fact, I’m the one who should be sorry. and I am, yeah?” his hand stroked her hair in a careful manner. “don’t be in such a rush, shiloh, please,” he murmured and sighed. “can I get you something? do you need anything? anything at all?” he was worried for her again and he didn’t even realize that until he carefully kissed her forehead and caught himself hoping that she would stay just a bit longer.

tagged: shiloh! smitten2